Unconventional Jobs to Shock Padosi Aunties

Growing up is a tough job. You basically must ‘grow up’. That includes giving up your dreams and your dream jobs. But in 2010, who says you need to give up job that the child inside you thinks is awesome?

When we were little, there were just two kinds of kids. The goodie good kids who wanted to fulfill their parents’ wishes of becoming doctors and engineers; and the other non-conformist kids who wanted to break social norms by becoming actors and actresses. Now there are plethora of opportunities for these cool kids and the list of unconventional jobs is never ending.

So here is a very, VERY consolidated list of the dreamiest jobs one could wish for, especially if money is not an issue.

Write reviews: If you worship the ground Rajeev Masand walks on, this job is for you. Not. It’s everyone’s dream to get paid for ripping apart movies, music, art and not to forget, video games! Reviews form a crucial part of any and every newspaper, channel, website, etc. these days. So there definitely is ample job opportunity. And surely we’d all be game to be paid for watching movies or playing games all day long.

Occupational hazard:Yes, yes, there is a downside to such an amazing job. With movies, music, books and art, you may have to endure the excruciating and the boring in a combo, money-saver pack and write about it too. As far as games go, you need to go through same portions of games that you probably find annoying and dissect each and every aspect of it. With gadgets too, the excruciating part comes when you are the first to use the product in your daily routine and find that it hampers your routine more than helping it. Easier said than done, this reviewing business, right?  
Pados Waali Aunty Shock Meter: 3/5

Taste Food/ Drinks: This kind of dream job is for the foodies who live to eat. For people who have more caffeine in their veins than blood, there can be nothing better than tasting coffee to earn their daily bread, is there? Ok, stop searching job sites for openings already and read ahead. How about tasting chocolates?  What you need to do is taste the food for inconsistencies and help developing products and dishes.

Occupational hazard: The job sounds like a piece of cake? Don’t be under the impression that the tasting sessions are something great dates are made of. You aren’t the guest but in a way you are the chef! Be open to brickbats because they’re going to be more than the bouquets.
Pados Waali Aunty Shock Meter: 4/5 (One point extra just for the fact that the sheepish aunty may ask you to taste her sarson ka saag every other day!)

Private Investigation: It doesn’t matter if you grew up loving the pipe smoking Sherlock Holmes or the carrot munching Karamchand, who hasn’t wished to crack cases and earn recognition? For those who had almost forgotten about this deep, dark ambition of theirs, the re- runs of CID on Sony have reignited that dream. Trailing suspects, investigating cases and helping damsels in distress is any chivalrous guy’s dream and what makes Private Investigation a dreamy job. And what the best part about this job is, that it doesn’t really require a qualification but just a sharp mind and eye.

Occupational hazard: What? Did you really think it was about helping lovely ladies in distress? Shut that 20’s whodunit novel and concentrate! You will have to trail Daandiya playing daughters of worried parents and spouses of fat, ugly people who you can bet are surely cheating on them. And being a private investigator is definitely not a full time job in this country, nope. 
Pados Waali Aunty Shock Meter: 1/5 till they don’t know and 6/5 once they do (that includes closing the blinds of their houses 24/7)

In today’s day and age, where there is scope for the wackiest jobs possible, everything is coming to be acceptable to the society (unless you’re a model or something, that’s still immoral.) No one will laugh at your dreams and even if they do, they’ll surely not laugh at the fat paycheck you take home, occupational hazard and neighbouring aunties notwithstanding.