Once you enter job, the only mission that parents have on the cards is to get you married. So, the project marriage becomes the dire need of their life and suddenly all the aunties and uncles start flooding you with best proposals for the most eligible bride/groom. But who knows your concern, and how hard it becomes to convince them that there are lot better things to take care of instead of focusing on marriage at this juncture of life.
When it comes to millennials, Gamophobia (fear of getting married and commitment) is often found active and alive. So why is this set of generation not interested in getting married? What makes them feel that marriage doesn’t offer the eternal bliss which their parents find as ultimate source of happiness? Let’s take a look at how millennials envision life when they are asked to get settled in marital bond:
1. Being ‘Single’ is a choice
As a matter of fact, one can stay single as long as they want to. Staying single has its own set of merits. You do not have to call and answer anyone about the time you will return home, about the days you will be free to go for shopping. You can eagerly embrace the spontaneous plans without having to think about the other side. Some people feel that they are self-reliant and independent enough to manage themselves. So the need of the partner is unnecessary unless they meet someone who can respect their individuality in a relation.
2. Societal pressure doesn’t matter anymore
Just because you’re best friends and all the other friends, and your near and far cousins are getting married, so you also have to get married is not a concern anymore. Today millennials don’t see marriage through the lens of sacrifices that their parents made to stay afloat. They are more interested in getting settled with someone who understands their career aspirations. Further, age is just a number when you want to get settled. Happiness and fulfilment is not a product of marriage. This concept has become age old for the millennials.
3. Marriage doesn't assure compatibility
To put it rightly, there are couples who stay aloof even after marriage. Nietzsche once said that “It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages”. Marriage is not a sure shot card to seek happiness and cordial relation. Your parents, family and friends must have told you several times that in old age you will need someone around. But how does marriage certify that your old age will be promising one after marriage. Those who stay ‘single’ by choice feel that life goes the way you perceive it and make it. Whether it’s a love marriage or an arranged one, compatibility matters more.
4. Career is the prime priority
The millennials is one generations unlike their parents. For them career comes first, and other things later. Even if it is marriage, they believe that after investing hefty sums on money in education, one must not put career to the backburner. With marriage, comes a unique set of responsibilities and only a good and established career can be an aid to settle them. Till the time one suffers from the load of financial responsibilities, marriage appears as a monster, ready to gobble your remaining days of life.
5. Commitment is a big responsibility
When you already have a demanding job, getting hitched can become a problem at later stage. It is natural to build expectations and when they don’t get fulfilled they way one plans, differences are bound to creep in. For the millennials, marriage is a thoughtful decision which doesn’t come easy. Once when they feel that their career decision and path is sorted, they move on with the decision to get married. Nonetheless, having too much on plate is never a good choice. One must be careful about picking the right stuff in the plate to avoid the leftovers. And marriage is one commitment which must not take a backseat once you decide to get bonded.
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