A Step in the Right Direction: Befriending Classmates

Befriending and mingling with unknown faces in your new college is part challenge and part fun

This is your first year in college and you are excited as well as sacred about meeting new people. It is natural to be anxious as you will be leaving the comfortable environs of the school and entering the uncharted college territory. Much has been said and written about ragging by seniors in college and the alienation one can encounter in a college. But you do not need to worry much about it.

College is the place to socialise and network. The friends you make here could be lifelong friends. You network with your peer group and with students from different batches. Some of them are probably going to influence your personal and professional life. So, the best way forward is to catch the bull by its horn.

Here are a few mantras that will help you tide over initial days in college:

1. Attend classes regularly: Surprised? Going to class ensures social interaction. You get to know your friends and classmates in less superficial ways. You learn about their points of view and know more clearly who your ‘type’ is and who is not.
2. Join campus fests and parties: There is a point to these orientation and fresher parties. Don’t be reluctant to join because you feel these are meant for groups already well coagulated. You’d be surprised to know the number of people who’ll take interest in you.
3. Join Clubs and groups: There are various clubs and groups in colleges like the sports clubs, nature clubs, debating society, dramatics group and political groups. These provide great opportunities to know like-minded people and a platform to use your utilise your talents. Here you can combine your interests and your friends.
4. Travel together: Now that you are in college, you might want to explore the country a bit on your own. Surprisingly, most travel buddies are easy to find and you don’t even need to be their best friend to ask for company. A lot of your batch mates will show interest. Just draw up a plan and get cracking!
5. Play, act and talk cool: It is good to be receptive and reach out to new people but if you are a socially shy person you can do a lot better if you didn’t bloom into a bubbling butterfly overnight.  Friendship is not like instant coffee. You are going to be in college for three to five years. Ample time. Take it slow.
6. Do not stay indoors endlessly: Go out to study. Studying at the library can be productive in more than one way. Even if the pages are killing you, occasional breaks can bring new people closer.
7. Don’t stick to your own class: Talk to seniors, juniors and their friends. It can be refreshing to talk about things other than just studies. Share movies, music and stories with them.
8. Do not play video games in the room: Video games and computer games are a great hindrance to actual human interaction. So keep those toys for a long lonely train journey and go out and talk to people.
9. Be confident: Don’t be afraid to talk to people. More importantly, be a good listener. Most people like those who listen to their opinions and respond meaningfully. A large part of what you say and its impact depends on how closely you have paid attention to the other person.
10. Don’t judge people: Don’t judge people who are not from your community or country too soon. If you have preconceived notions, you will probably miss out on some great conversations, cultural exchanges, places to visit and food! So go out and make friends with different cultural and educational backgrounds and discover how enriched your experiences will be in college!

Lastly, remember that most of your batchmates are as scared and intimidated in this new environment as you are. These are the people who will be more than happy if you took an interest in them. They’ll also equally be enthusiastic to explore the campus and its surroundings with you. So stop feeling like the odd ball and happily embrace this exciting episode of your life!